六位皇后

_________, how are you doing tonight?

We said, how are you doing tonight?

We are…

SIX

And welcome to our "Divorced, Beheaded, Live" tour!

_________, we've got a whole lot in store for you tonight.

That's right Girl, we've got riffs to ruffle your ruffs!

Shimmies to shake up your chemise.

And a whole lotta history.

Or as we like to call it… HER story.

So obviously you know who we are.

Please, no portraits.

But let's give it up for our

LADIES IN WAITING!

WE'VE GOT MAGGIE ON THE GEE-TAR!

WE'VE GOT BESSIE ON THE BASS!

And killing it on the keys we've got Joan!

And with beats so sick they'll give you gout, it's Maria on the drums!

So you came here to party with us old school.

Really, really old school (laughs at own joke, then:) But we're not here to have fun.

Uh uh.

We've got a serious score to settle.

'Cause you see, _________, the problem is there's–

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–of us and we know you've all got your favourite.

Yes, everyone wants to know who's the most important wife.

And they've been arguing about it for centuries.

We've heard it all…

Who lasted longest is the strongest.

The biggest sinner is obvs the winner.

Who had the son takes number one.

Who was most chaste shall be first placed.

The most inglorious is victorious.

The winning contestant was the most protestant.

But tonight we're gonna answer your questions once and for all.

And… TELL YA WHATCHA WANT, WHATCHA REALLY REALLY WANT…

to know…

That's right. We're here to help you figure out which of us is…

The Queen of the Castle.

The rose among the thorns.

The Thomas Cromwell among the royal ministers between 1532 and 1540.

But how in purgatory are they gonna choose their leading lady?

Well hold up. If this is gonna be a fair competition they're gonna have to judge us

by the one thing we have in common.

The Queen to take crown should be the one who had the biggest.

The firmest.

The fullest.

…load of BS to deal with from the man who put a ring on it.

So, _________, we're gonna hold a little contest for you;

And the rules are very simple.

The Queen who was dealt the worst hand.

The Queen with the most hardships to withstand.

The Queen for whom it didn't really go as planned.

Shall be the one to lead the band.

So what do you think _________, are you ready to choose your leading lady?

Oh, come on, we said ARE YOU READY?

WELCOME TO THE SHOW TO THE CORONATION

WHO WILL TAKE THE CROWN, BE THE POP SENSATION?

EV'RYBODY KNOWS THAT WE USED TO BE

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But there's only one that you need to hear from tonight. _________, i'm about to